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Thursday, June 03, 2010

40 Reasons to Come to South Africa

1. We have Roxy Louw (above). Voted FHM's sexiest woman in the world.
2. If you come before June 11 you can catch the FIFA 2010 Soccer World Cup.
3. Nelson Mandela was born here. Madiba!
4. Jeremy Clarkson says this is a great place to visit.
5. Obama is from here ... well Kenya; close enough.
6. We have no tornadoes, earthquakes, hurricanes or cyclones.
7. Charlize Theron is from here, Benoni to be exact. Howzit Benoni!
8. If you come here you will be called "Bru" and/or "China".
9. You might see a genuine lion and/or car hijacker in the street (the hijacker in the street, not the lion).
10. The Springboks actually beat the Lions. You may now bask in our glory.
11. You will learn to drive on the left side of the road, which happens to be the side God intended for people to drive on!
12. We have Table Mountain.
13. We have great beaches and surfing!
14. Kerry McGregor, Candice Swanepoel and Minki van der Westhuizen are also from here.
15. We have many many many wild animals.
16. We have DJ Fresh!
17. We have Mango Groove.
18. Clint Eastwood made a movie about how we kick ass. Invictus!
19. The word "Commando" is South African.
20. It is possible that Kimberley has the oldest street lights in the world. Unfortunately they switch them off at 8pm when everybody there goes to bed.
21. Yes, we have crime, but he looks just like the crime from Britian or Australia. Please do not discriminate or we will make you listen to Steve Hofmeyr!
22. We have no jails. Criminals are sent to Steve Hofmeyr concerts.
23. During the Tri-nations series you will see real New Zealanders! I kid you not, Bru!
24. Did I mention Roxy Louw?
25. In ten years most children will look like Steve Hofmeyr. See us before then!
26. Learn some Afrikaans: Hello - "Stormers Bo"
How are you - "Die Bulle suig"
27. Learn to survive in Hillbrow.
28. Meet some interesting people and a lot of South Africans.
29. Listen to Gareth Cliff being right about everything on radio!
30. Meet Barack Obama.*
31. Have your hearing impaired with genuine South African Vuvuzelas!
32. Oh, yes, let's not forget about Roxy Louw!
33. Enjoy a genuine "braai". Anybody who calls it a "barbie" or a "barbecue" will be made to listen to Steve Hofmeyr.
34. The Bulls suck.
35. See genuine Bulls Supporters. Prepare to be shocked!
36. See Lions eating Jackals. See Cheetahs eating Springbuck. See Benni McCarthy eating everything!
37. See the South African Space programme. Yes, it's in Ventersdorp; go there and to find it simply say "Die AWB is Hoenders"
38. Stormers Rule!
39. See the Drakensberg Mountains, J.R.R. Tolkien's inspiration for The Lord of the Rings. No really!
40. When you are done go home, just leave your money here please.

* Yeah Right!

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